Earth's most beloved podcast

THIS IS NOT A TEST with Michael Jerome Phillips


THIS IS NOT A TEST, with your pal and confidant Michael Jerome Phillips

Dropping Propaganda From My Helicopter in the Sky

Spring brings the Western Tanager, Earth Day, The Flintstones, Vietnam, food from the future, whales, protest, unenlightenment, the tools of oppression, laws, tribes, DNA, COVID, the great Liberal machine, foxes, lizards, cocktails, misdirection, the CDC, guano, mankind, newspuppets, the solution to everything, Girl Scout cookies, the pendulum, chipmunks, pretty shoes, Questlove, Santana, the Monkees, and coyotes.

Links mentioned in the episode:
Hard to Handle: The Life and Death of the Black Crowes
Mo’ Meta Blues: The World According to Questlove
The Universal Tone: Bringing My Story to Light

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THIS IS NOT A TEST episode 108

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I Got No Friends ‘Cause They Read the Papers

It’s springtime, so let’s talk about…COVID-19? That discussion is unavoidable, yes, but don’t forget about jackrabbits, owls, coyotes, hazmat, malaria medicine, sensitivity, self-fulfilling prophesy, mascara, gourds, bunkers, Coven, Bob Marley, Aussie twats, an abundance of caution, social distancing, paid vacations, ramen noodles, toilet paper, Instagram, water, karaoke, skin, national parks, desert tortoises, ravens, garbage, grapes, Los Angeles, the death of ideological conservatism, Quaking Aspen, selling your soul, The Day The Earth Stood Still, bullets, President Clinton the second, wigs, and one love.

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THIS IS NOT A TEST episode 107

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SCIENTISTS VERIFY THAT WORLDWIDE CORONAVIRUS HYSTERIA IS COMPLETELY JUSTIFIED! ALL WILL DIE! REPEAT: ALL WILL DIE! LISTEN NOW TO LEARN HOW TO SURVIVE!

Terrified of catching a cold? Don’t be, I’ve got you covered. Calm yourself by listening to my reassuring voice lulling you into an alpha wave-rich state of near catatonia by talking about hawks, burritos, cruise ships, toilet paper, Ira Glass, Portlandia, the death of half of the human race, super Tuesday, civil war, collapsed roofs, machines in the garage, politics and humanity, idiots, SEO, more idiots, writing for an audience of noodles, rules, rules, and more rules, some more idiots, removing the hair from around your nipples – wait, I didn’t talk about that, I was just thinking about it – college professors, Google, content, deplorables, cookies, complaining, cereal boxes, and a public service announcement.

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THIS IS NOT A TEST episode 106 - how to survive the Coronavirus

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Go Fly a Kite and Other Mild Insults

Hi, remember me? I thought you might like to talk about dogs, jobs, moms, flying kites and Jolly Rogers, sleeping on pool tables, corn, Mai Tais with Buddha, white Christmas, metadata, Showtime at The Apollo, which Sex in the City character are you?, getting old, Christmas music, Van Morrison, The Wailers, fistfights, puppetheads, Joe Strummer, particles, white people, Survivor, Trevy, patois, Rastafari, appreciation vs. appropriation, Cross Colours jackets, why you should stop telling people you’re a DJ, and propane in the membrane.

Links mentioned in the episode:
mjp Books

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Jolly Roger kites rule

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Here We Are Again on the First Saturday of the Month

And here I am again telling you, “Not this time, hombre.”

I was looking forward to speaking to you today, but some savage bastard a dentist ripped a molar out of my head a few days ago, and non-essential talking isn’t a super attractive prospect at the moment.

Besides, I just got my nails did, and I’m not about to fuck them up working dials and microphones and what have you. Please.

got my nails did

Vanished From iTunes Like a Five Dollar Bill From a Three-Card Monte Table

iTunes, man's greatest gift to Satan

The fine and wonderful folks at Apple changed the iTunes categories for what appears to be no reason, and when I updated my feed to adapt to those changes I must have changed something else that made iTunes drop the podcast from their listings completely.

I think I’ve fixed it, but we’ll see.

Come Fly With Me

Let’s talk about air travel, airplanes, and people, and maybe also the Eiffel Tower, the Grand Canyon, Palm Springs in the summer, LAX, a deep, hacking, ugly cough, Pringles, pretzels, vodka, pasta salad, La-Z-Boys, Mountain Dew, nuns, flowy peasant blouses, iPods, Tunis Air, half-price fajita night, tuberculosis, and the joys of a good mani/pedi.

Links mentioned in the episode: The Integratron

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THIS IS NOT A TEST - Come Fly With Me

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